I had to resist the temptation to correct the speaker on the spot. Also, if I did, which I did in the end, by the way, where would I start? Would it be the “it don’t” howler? Or the typical London-accented “ma’er”? “Coz”, perhaps? Or, “innit”, again, a Cockney-influenced linguistic prop commonly used by the villagers of Londontown? In the end I just corrected the “it don’t” and the “innit”. Couldn’t be arsed to deal with the rest.
And that’s English for you, my dears.
Where do the boundaries of what is considered “good” English start? Where do they end? This was the subject of a recent, fascinating debate in the pages of Prospect magazine between Simon Heffer, author of Strictly English: The Correct Way toWrite and Oliver Kamm, who recently penned Accidence Will Happen: The Non-Pedantic Guide to English Usage.
 |
| Enough to give a pedant a heart attack |
I could write another hundred posts like this, a thousand articles, a million words and the message will always be the same: as a non-native speaker, I am truly mesmerised by the seriousness with which the English language is taken. I was never surprised about finding linguistic pedants in my own native Spanish. Nor was I to find them in French, too, when I began to study the language. Both Spanish and French have academies that act as the guardians of the language. Compared to both, English was a breath of fresh air.
How wrong I was. From slamming miscreants who violate the rule that dictates that pronouns change their case when they follow prepositions to indulging in the peccadillo of fused participles, the English language (or at least its defenders) can sometimes come across as modern inquisitors.
Heffer makes a good point about correct English being the standard from which most dialects are derived. It is true that if you do not have a word like “father”, it is unlikely you will come up with its patois equivalent “fadda”. On the other hand, Oliver’s riposte that the problem is not English grammar but the constant, obsessive linguistic nit-picking, is the type of argument with which I totally agree.
Where I think both columnists fail miserably is in not moving their debate beyond the narrow confines of language. Not everyone who uses slang, or falls into the trap of the grocer’s apostrophe is an illiterate person. Social, historical, economic and even political elements come into play in daily parlance. If you were born in one of Britain’s former colonies, your patois might be a way to defy the old, imperial status quo. If you feel that society is out to get you, language becomes a barrier with which to defend yourself. The wall you build around you or the trench you dig to duck in is made of words that only you and a select group of people will be able to understand. In that case pedants will become ammunition for your cause.
To be sure, there are various shades of grey in this discussion and I find myself siding slightly with Mr Kamm rather than with The Heffza. Parents, teachers and society in general must act together to teach our younger generation the context in which they can use a particular phrase and when it is better to default to Standard English. Replacing “they’re” with “their”, “would have” with “would of” and “you’re” with “your” is grammatically incorrect. Same with “don’t” in the third person singular. We live in a world where the job market has shrunk considerably in the last seven years. It would be irresponsible and plainly idiotic for a young person to deny themselves the opportunity to break into that market just because they can’t be bothered to switch to Standard English. At the same time there is a time and place for “ma’er” (“matter”, but with a London accent) and “innit”. In my opinion, these are not mistakes but identity markers.
Knowing when to use one and not the other is one of the most valuable lessons I have learnt in my life. Not just in English but also in Spanish. We, Cubans, have a reputation in the Hispanic world for being hard to understand, given our proclivity for chopping off the end of words (especially those ending in “s” and “r”) and leaving sentences unfinished. Taking into consideration that this contravenes the rules laid down by the “holier-than-thou” Royal Spanish Academy, I should be on Oliver’s side, wearing my linguistic rebelliousness on my sleeve. Yet, I am also very practical. Nail that job first, son, and then go back to your natural, linguistic, niche, aw'ight mate?
© 2015
Next Post: “Saturday Evenings: Stay In, Sit Up and Switch On", to be published on Saturday 7th March at 6pm (GMT)
fun romp through the English carnival!
ReplyDeleteALOHA from Honolulu
ComfortSpiral
=^..^=
Romping through it indeed! :-)
DeleteGreetings from London.
Not sure if you have ever been in Canada...here in Quebec, in particular, but the French here have their own dialect. Even people who are French speaking from other countries (Algeria, France, Haiti, etc.) have a difficult time comprehending the French spoken here, as it is known as Quebecois. I am fluent in French and I have lived here in Montreal all my life so I am accustomed to the French spoken here, but I must say that my accent, when I speak French, is closer to the accent in France than here in Quebec, and I choose to keep it this way. At least if I travel to another country or the French speaking tourists who come here to Montreal can understand what I am saying. :)
ReplyDeleteHeard a lot about Quebecois, both language and character! :-)
DeleteGreetings from London.
The spoken language and the written language need to be considered separately in many respects, I think. So much of an individual's spoken language hinges on where he grew up, where he lives and works as an adult, which groups he socializes with and, often, the educational level of his friends. Written language, on the other hand, has more to do with formal education.
ReplyDeleteHaving once been an English teacher (briefly), I used to dwell on proper grammar. When I became involved in journalism, I discovered newspaper style books often varied from one newspaper to another and sometimes were at odds with grammar books. It was during this period I decided proper language, like beauty, is mostly in the eye of the beholder and the thoughts of pedantic victims of "idiocraphobia."
P.S. Word definition, I think, is more important and complicated than grammar.
That's a whole different can of worms you've opened there, sir! :-) Word definition. Where to start?
DeleteGreetings from London.
Sigh. And when we add text speak to the mix it becomes even more complicated. Sadly, knowing that so many factors come into play, I do make judgements based on people's use (abuse) of the language. Context matters, but some things get my hackles up regardless of where they are used.
ReplyDeleteI once interviewed a guy for a voluntary position at the organisation for which I used to work. He'd forgot his CV so I asked him to e-mail him to me with a covering letter. The e-mail and covering letetr were written in text-speak. Needless to say he never volunteered with us. Unfair? A tad bit. But he didn't mae the right impression, no effort.
DeleteGreetings from London.
lol! You wrote "I asked him to e-mail him to me" and "But he didn't mae the right..."
Delete"make". Sorry! :-) ¡Jodedora! :-)
DeleteSaludos desde Londres.
As an English writer I can get very pedantic about grammar.
ReplyDeleteBut as a traveller I've come to see things a bit differently. When I was in India I was told people find it hard to understand me because of my accent. But (I had to sense not to say) I don't have an accent, you do. Then it dawned - there are many different Englishes. There's all our lovely accents and idiosyncrasies. Then there's the range of American English, and Australian English, and Indian English, and Nepali English, and Nigerian English ... in every country with English as a second, if not a first, language, it has evolved slightly differently. So now I'm much more likely to get huffy when people say or write things that sound clumsy to me, I remind myself that they are simply different and not necessarily wrong. Except for 'innit'.
As an ex-English teacher, I am pedantic, but less than I used to be. I think living in Britain has softened me. When you learn a foreign language outside the linguistic context of that language it is easier to be a pedant than when you confront different accents.
DeleteGreetings from London.
Oh dear...I feel something of a hypocrite when it comes to language usage (or abuse)!
ReplyDeleteWhilst it does annoy me to hear the English language being misused (and I feel an overwhelming urge to correct the speakers at those times), I do still love listening to certain accents and dialects, such as Geordie and and West Country, neither of which can be labelled as "pure English"...in fact, impeccably spoken English can quickly become boring to the ear!
See my point? Hypocrisy!! ;)
Have a Great Day :)
Welcome to the club! :-)
DeleteGreetings from London.
I've always been told that one of the attractions of English is that it is easier to make yourself understood if you speak it very badly, than it is in other languages. Not being fluent in any other languages, I don't know if this is true. What do you think?
ReplyDeleteYou have a point there. In English a mispronounced word can still be understood by proxy. That means that we're so used to English as a lingua franca and we're so exposed to it through the medium of television, literature, cinema and the like that if I were to say "cut" for "cat" you would still understand it as "cat". Amazing.
DeleteGreetings from London.
It is just hard on the head when people talk like that. But over the years it morphs and can be understood. I think it makes people stupider or then again maybe smarter if they can decipher all the slang and crap.
ReplyDeleteEl tener un buen lenguaje hace uno se de cuenta de lo que no funciona al oír hablar, comprendo tu reacción.
ReplyDeleteSaludos.
I could barely read your post as that photo with the bad spelling/grammar disturbed me so much!
ReplyDeletei think it is subjective to where we are in the moment...the linguistics of here....as opposed to our homeland...
ReplyDeletetrust me, there are places here in the states that speak a very different english than where i live...
to them it is normal though and i am the one that sounds funny...
Hi dear! You remember me:))
ReplyDeleteWhen I begin to make my posts my problem was the linguistics sometimes are a mess for me:))
Hugssss
Having grown up speaking the "Down East North Carolina Coastal Southern accent," and having spent most of my adult life outside the South, I have gotten use to people making comments about my dialect and use of the language, but it also helps me be noticed so I tried to use it to my advantage. I also don't worry too much about how other people use language as long as I can understand their intent. I wonder if some of the problem is that people are too lazy to listen well.
ReplyDeleteHmm. I just left a reply, but I don't see it!
ReplyDeleteI do! :-)
DeleteGreetings from London.
This is a great post! I am humbled by the fact that it's written by someone for whom English is a second language.
ReplyDeleteI am a self-confessed grammar pedant. It wounds me to see the aberrant apostrophe, and the replacing of your for you're, would of for would have, to for too, etc. I cringe when I read texts with no punctuation and/or no capitalisation. However. I do make mistakes, and as you see, I am not averse to playing around with the language and breaking the rules if I think that the words flow better that way. I begin sentences with a conjunction, and end others with a preposition. I am in love with the zeugma and syllepsis. I over-use punctuation!! And I often speak badly, too, so you'll hear me say 'wossup', 'dunno' and 'abso-bloody-lutely', etc on a regular basis.
But you're absolutely right, I believe it's important to actually know and understand the rules and to be able to write correctly when necessary, because if you don't, you ain't gonna get nowhere in today's job market, innit?
You're also right that language is a living, fluid thing. The most important thing is that we communicate clearly with those we want to communicate with. Those we want to be accepted by, we mimic. Those we want to exclude - well, that's kind of fun, isn't it? Having a language of your own which is incomprehensible to others outside your 'tribe' can be very useful.
'coffee's and tea's - ouch!
ReplyDeleteInteresting post, Cuban. I can forgive accents that interfere with pronunciation but I cannot forgive the gross destruction of the English language. Another thing that spoils it for me is the exaggerated use of swear words that take place in the spoken and written word.
ya know... i love to play with language... though i find it important that the basics are saddle proof - it's like improvising on an instrument.. if you learned your lessons there's much freedom for playing and improvising as well
ReplyDeleteInteresting post! The spoken word is very much an expression of personality. Dialects are fascinating, even if they aren't always easy to understand. They have character, which is a good thing for self-expression, but not a very bright thing if one is more interested in actual communication on in getting a job. In the job market, one has to be easily understood to be a viable employee.
ReplyDeleteStill, I'm much more forgiving of verbal lapses than I am of written ones. Misspellings and grammatical errors drive me nuts. I think the reason they are so much more prevalent now than when I was young is because of a difference in teaching methods. When I was in school, we were expected to use proper spelling, grammar and punctuation in EVERY class. When my kids were in school, they weren't even marked down for those things in English class. Supposedly, teachers didn't want to stifle creativity. They were more interested in the ideas than they were in how those ideas were expressed. I'm pretty sure our grandchildren are taught in that same manner.
The language barrier. English is a little word itself, don't you think? :D
ReplyDeleteI think that this is a bigger issue in England than in the U.S. Here of course the issue is about English/bilingualism/Spanish, etc., and not necessarily about usage--that's my sense- (maybe people have given up in a way! As there is very incorrect usage at really high levels--see our last President before Obama, for example. Agh.)
ReplyDeleteThe problem, as you say, is that language is for communication and the rules etc really are about precision--saying or writing what you mean--people feel as if there is nitpicking, but to some degree articulate expression can also help with thinking things through-- (Certainly, I am often an offender.) And with the arrival of texting in the U.S., written speech is completely degraded, in my view. Anyway, thanks! k. (Manicddaily)